JUDGE CAUGHT ON CAMERA FLATTENING TIRE PLEADS GUILTY, PAYS FINE

We previously brought you the story of Judge Robert C. Nalley, who let the air out of a poor female courthouse employee’s tire for having the temerity to park in Judge Nally’s preferred (but not reserved or marked) parking spot.

Not only was hiz honor not in the least bit apologetic at the time, he defiantly proclaimed that had done it before.

Now, courtesy of the sometimes hilarious law blog Above the Law—who named Judge Nalley it’s “Judge of the Day” when the story first broke—we have been informed that the criminal case against Judge Nalley has been resolved.

The tire slashing jurist has pleaded guilty to “tampering with an automobile”, paid a $500 fine, written the courthouse employee whose tire got flattened a “heartfelt” letter of apology, and will now have his criminal record erased, the Washington Post reports.

No word yet from the Maryland State judicial governing authorities for the judge’s (initially) unrepentant and unseemly behavior.


ATTORNEY WHO GOT 90 DAYS FOR MAKING JACK-OFF GESTURE IN COURT LOSES APPEAL



This appellate result is, we think, unremarkable—except for the fact that it reminded us of the court-room conduct of one Austin, TX solo practitioner Adam Reposa, who on March 11 of this year made a “jack-off” gesture in open court in response to a prosecutor’s argument, and was summarily sentenced by a less-than-amused trial judge to 90 days in the bucket for contempt. (See prior, juicy Above the Law coverage here.)

In an 8-1 decision today, the Texas Court of Criminal Appeals denied Reposa’s application for a writ of habeas corpus in his contempt case.

According to the Texas Lawyer Tex Parte Bog, Reposa took the news in stride, stating “Oh well.”
Oh well indeed.

BTW, we somehow doubt that Reposa’s 2006 on-air attack on a certain Austin judge in Reposa’s stomping grounds added bench or appellate sympathy to his cause. (See video here.)

A teeny gem from the opinion:

“During the contempt hearing, Leavitt asked [Reposa], "Were you placed on some type of probation as you were first put - given your law license?" [Reposa’s] counsel objected on relevance. Judge Davis heard the testimony prior to ruling on the objection. [Reposa] testified: "I have had mental health issues in the past. I didn't file my declaration of intent, my application until my third year of law school. And the State Bar wanted me to have an attorney monitor who deals with mental health issues and substance abuse issues." Judge Davis sustained the objection as to the reason for the attorney monitor-that is, as to the mental health issues-but overruled the objection as to the fact of an attorney monitor.”

Mental health and substance abuse issues in the past? And yet Reposa was still admitted to the Texas Bar? Yikes!

QUESTIONS REMAIN AFTER ACQUITTAL OF PERVERT SPANKING JUDGE

Opinion, by Blogonaut

If Thomas, J. regarded the 100 charges of sexual misconduct involving 16 inmates as absurd, why did he voluntarily give up his judgeship when the charges were first filed?

Testimony from the trial revealed a regular pattern of checking young black male inmates out of the Metro Jail and, at the very least, directly intervening in their cases.

Then there is the pesky fact that, according to trial forensics, semen from two inmates came to be lodged in the carpet of Mr. Thomas' special private office, where it was alleged that he paddled inmates on their bare buttocks.

As the Alabama Press Register points out in an Op-Ed piece, “the scope of misconduct in office remains disturbing — even more so now that testimony from the trial revealed a regular pattern of checking young black male inmates out of the Metro Jail and, at the very least, directly intervening in their cases.”

Also, how was Thomas, J. able for years to manipulate cases by taking them from other judges, alter rulings of other judges and, most interesting of all, personally take inmates out of jail?

The state court case is over, but do questions remain?

Remind me; what do wild boars do in the woods?
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For more coverage of this story see here and here.

ALABAMA PERVERT SPANKING JUDGE CLEARED OF ALL CHARGES


***BREAKING***

Associated Press

OK, if you have any legal literacy at all, or read any legal tabloid publications—including our personal favorite—David Lat’s AbovetheLaw.com—then you know that former Alabama judge Herman Thomas, until today, stood criminally accused of trading kinky gay spanking sex for the favorable treatment of his inmate victims.

Defense attorneys say the 48-year-old Thomas was a prominent civic leader who became a victim of felons lying about him to manipulate the court system.

For David Lat’s prior (and highly amusing) blog coverage see here and here.

Prosecutors say he brought 11 young male inmates to a private courthouse office and severely paddled their bare bottoms for sexual gratification. Some testified they had sexual contact with the judge.

It made for highly amusing tabloid fodder, except for one thing: 30 minutes ago his honor, a/k/a thank-you-sir-may-I-have-another, was acquitted, as in found NOT GUILTY.

Alabama justice or something else?

Stay tuned….

WORLD’S DUMBEST LAWYER TALKS ACQUITTING JURY INTO CONVICTION

OK, we are familiar with a great many urban legends—including a goodly number of confirmed accounts—of dumb-ass lawyer moves, but this one pretty much takes the cake.

By way of background, either side in a criminal case has a right to have the jury “polled” after a verdict, in order to test whether each individual juror in fact voted to acquit or convict (as the case may be). But for obvious reasons, the side who won NEVER asks that the jury be polled, because there is zero upside for your client—only the possibility that the jury might be sent back to deliberate anew—should a dissenting juror reveal herself during the polling process.

And sure enough that is exactly what happened when defense attorney Charles S. Hamilton, III of Seattle, Washington, asked that a jury be polled after acquitting his client in a vehicular assault case.

Predictably, the attorney’s dumb-ass mistake turned his client Patricia Sylvester’s initial tears of joy into sobs of despair when the polling Hamilton-Dumbbell, III requested not only revealed a dissenting vote on the jury for guilt, but ultimately resulted in the trial judge ordering the jury to deliberate until a unanimous verdict was reached—which the jury did. Only that unanimous verdict was GUILTY!

We have to agree with Legal Blog Watch on this point. PRACTICE TIP: When the judge or jury has just agreed with you, zip it.
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In the elegantly simple words of NYC criminal dense attorney Scott Greenfeild--author of Simple Justice:

“No folks, it doesn't get any dumber than this.”

Hat tip to Martha Neil at the ABA Journal for bringing this dumbest lawyer story to our attention.

Simple Justice blog: "of such abject stupidity that it can't go unnoticed."

After Trial Win, Defense Lawyer Polls Jury, Gets Guilty Verdict (ABA J.)

Jury finds woman ‘not guilty,’ then ‘guilty’ (Whidbey News-Times)

Rule 1: When the Judge Agrees With You, Stop Talking (LBW)

CALIFORNIA LAWYER ARRESTED FOR 1989 MURDER

The Associated Press

*****BREAKING******

California attorney Eric Fagan—who authored a book about Internet dating—was arrested for the alleged slaying 20 years ago of is girlfriend’s daughter--so the woman could gain custody of her granddaughter, authorities told the Associated Press.

Fagan, 74, was arrested at his home in Chula Vista and was being held without bail on suspicion of murder and attempted murder, according to a San Bernardino County Sheriff's Department statement.

Fagan is accused of shooting Cathy Paternoster, then 32, and wounding Carl Fuerst, then 41, outside their Spring Valley Lake home in 1989.

According to State Bar of California records, Fagan is a graduate of the Irvine University School of Law and has no significant prior disciplinary record with the State Bar. He as been an attorney since 1979.

In June, 2001 Fagan published a book through the Harvard Common Press titled “Cast Your Net: A Step-by-Step Guide to Finding Your Soulmate on the Internet".

According to Fagan’s website, the criminally accused septuagenarian barrister graduated Magna Cum Laude from the Irvine University School of Law in Southern California in 1979, and began practicing real estate law.

In 1995, he turned his practice over to two of his sons, Craig and Stuart.

No word on whether Craig or Stuart handles criminal cases.

PRESIDENT OBAMA WINS HEISMAN TROPHY

***Breaking***

October 16, 2009
Washington DC

President Barack Obama, fresh on the heals of his stunning receipt of the Nobel Peace Prize, has just snagged one of college football’s most prestigious awards.

His name was submitted for the award by George Soros just moments after Obama watched 10 minutes of a college game on television aboard Air Force One.

Obama learned about the Heisman while traveling to accept the Alfred E. Newman award for the most undeserved awards.

Obama said: "I will accept the Heisman trophy in the spirit in which it was awarded: As a tribute to the aspirational nature of my desire to someday play a decent game of touch football—much like the Kennedy’s.” Keeping things in perspective, Obama related that when his daughters heard the news they quickly added, “And we are going off of daylight savings time soon.”

Meanwhile, the most recent stunning high profile award to be given to the 44th President of the United States did little to calm Obama’s Republican critics in Congress, who are already bristling over Obama’s award last week of Olympic gold medals in ten events--years before the 2012 Olympics were even held-and are once again reviving the "celebrity" issue.

Related News Stories: President Nominated for Medal of Honor-Even Though He Never Served In Uniform (WaPo)

JURY AWARDS $9M IN PENIS DAMAGE LAWSUIT



The Atlanta Journal-Constitution

Apparently a limp but attractive penis is worth more than an ugly one—9 million dollars more to be exact.

That is the round sum that an Illinois jury awarded to John Henry Howard, 53, a former erectile dysfunction patient turned plaintiff against Boston Men’s Health Center Inc.—a company counter-intuitively based in Altamont Springs, Florida, but which operates 22 ED clinics across the United States relying heavily on radio advertising.

Howard, a truck driver, testified he went to Boston Medical Group’s Atlanta clinic for help with erectile dysfunction in 2006.

He was give a 6 months supply of a drug and told to hypodermically inject it into his penis. (Now this was a guy highly motivated to have an erection! The “little blue pill” seems a tad more attractive at this point.)

Howard’s use of the injected drug led to priaprism, a prolonged erection for more than four hours—which can cause penile damage and scaring.

Boston Medical Group argued that Howard disregarded their instructions to immediately seek medical treatment in the event of a prolonged erection.

You know the warning at the end of the Viagra commercials?

Apparently, Howard was so thrilled with the immediate results (and what man with ED and his wife or girlfriend wouldn’t be) that he failed to seek medical attention after his first injection into the one eyed monster resulted in a mega erection lasting 48 hours.

At this point (a probably exhausted) Howard finally saw a doctor, but by then it was too late to avoid permanent cosmetic damage to the critical member.

Now Howard is stuck with a less than attractive penis—but then again nine million dollars buy’s a lot of consolation—even after a 1/3 contingent fee for Howard’s attorney.

STANFORD LAW GRAD TURNED HOOKER SENTENCED TO HOUSE ARREST


Stanford University law school graduate Cristina Warthen (shown, above) will have to serve a year of home detention for failing to pay taxes on money she earned while working as a prostitute.

She'll also have to pay the government about $243,000, instead of the $313,000 established in a previous plea arrangement.

Prosecutors agreed to the lower amount when Cristina Warthen demonstrated she could not pay the full amount after her divorce from online entrepreneur David Warthen, the co-founder of the online search engine Ask Jeeves, now known as Ask.com, the San Jose Mercury News reports.

As nicely summarized by the newspaper:

“During a hearing in San Jose federal court, U.S. District Judge James Ware concluded he needed to impose those restrictions on Cristina Warthen after federal prosecutors disclosed she's continued to advertise herself on the Internet as a high-priced escort, even as she awaited sentencing on federal tax evasion charges related to her days as an upscale prostitute named "Brazil."

“Warthen gained notoriety when she was busted as a jet-setting call girl who sold her services to pay off her Stanford Law School debts. She got her law degree from Stanford in May 2001, but quickly began to run a steamy Web site with offers to jet off for liaisons with clients in cities around the country, including New York, Chicago and Washington, D.C.

“But Ware was dismayed to learn from federal prosecutors and probation officials that Warthen has continued to advertise her escort services as she has awaited sentencing. Assistant U.S. Attorney David Callaway told the judge Warthen has posted ads on the Internet offering "companionship" for $2,000 a night."

“It pains me ... to be advised that you are asking the court for permission to engage in advertising an escort business," Ware told Warthen.

Not so pained as to jeopardize Warthen’s plea deal, however.

(Check out her new website—apparently designed to promote the repentant prostitute for public appearances—at http://www.cristinawarthen.com/ . But she will have to finish her year of house arrest first.)

VEGAS ATTORNEY FIRED GUN AFTER CHOKING DOG, ASSAULTING JUDGE

Last week we reported the spooky coincidence of the judge who was elected to replace 400 pound Elizabeth Halverson (who was assaulted by her husband named Ed)--District Judge Stefany Miley being assaulted last week by her husband, attorney Ed Miley.

Now, more details about the domestic violence incident are being reported today by the Las Vegas Review Journal after examining court documents in connection with Judge Miley’s successful attempt to obtain a restraining order prohibiting barrister Miley (who represented OJ Simpson in his Vegas robbery case) to stay away from his wife and kids—following the lawyer’s arrest on two counts of domestic battery.

The blow-by-blow (so to speak) reported by the newspaper:

"According to the documents filed in the Family Division of Clark County District Court, Stefany Miley arrived home from her son's school and found her husband was visibly drunk.

“The document said she told her husband she wanted a divorce, and he began making "nasty comments" to her. “Her husband then "body slammed her, and came up behind her and hit her in the hip area," court documents said.

“The court papers said Edward Miley then became abusive with the family dog. The documents said Stefany Miley heard her dog yelping and went downstairs. She saw her husband grabbing the dog by the throat and threatening to kill it.


"Stefany Miley pulled the dog away from her husband, but he managed to chase the dog upstairs and began choking it. “The police report said the dog bit him when he was taking it out of the kennel at their home. Stefany Miley told police her husband was already drunk before being bitten.

“When police arrested Edward Miley, they saw blood on his hands and shirt, the police report said. The report added that a veterinarian service had been called for the dog. “According to the report, one of the couple's sons told police he saw his father hit his mom and choke the dog.”

What the Review Journal omitted from today’s article is the additional allegation that barrister Miley also discharged a weapon into the back yard during the domestic violence incident.

According to an on-line report yesterday published by Fox5Vegas.com:


“The judge said when she tried to stop her husband he pushed her to the floor in front of their children. [Miley] said he grabbed a gun and fired off several rounds in the backyard.”


According to the temporary protective order, Edward Miley is not allowed to be within 100 yards of his home, his children's elementary school and his wife's workplace, the Regional Justice Center.

Which should prove challenging for barrister Miley—a criminal defense attorney whose work is at the Regional Justice Center.



JUDGE HALVERSON CURSE: HER REPLACEMENT JUDGE ALSO ASSAULTED BY HUSBAND

What is it about the Las Vegas bench and their spouses?

First Las Vegas Judge Elizabeth Halverson (already in the news for other reasons) was beaten by her ex-felon husband Ed Halverson with a frying pan.

Now, Vegas District Judge Stefany Miley (above) has something else in common with Elizabeth Halverson—other than occupying the same district court seat formerly held by the 400 pound jurist:

According to the Las Vegas Sun:

“The husband of District Judge Stefany Miley was arrested late Thursday on a domestic battery charge following a disturbance at the couple's home.

Edward Miley, a lawyer who represented one of the defendants in the O.J. Simpson robbery case, was taken into custody sometime after Metro Police arrived at the scene about 9 p.m., according to a police report obtained by the Sun. He was then taken to the Clark County Detention Center to be booked into the jail.”

The Sun article goes on to note:

“Judge Miley — [is] a former Family Court judge who was elected last year to the District Court seat vacated by Elizabeth Halverson…”

Yikes! That judicial seat is cursed?

Now that is a scary thought.

Although Judge Miley and Halverson bear no physical resemblance (the former a blond, the latter a brunette) they appear to have (alleged) similar taste in husbands.

Stay tuned here for more coverage of the Judge Halverson curse.
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In the interim, we would strongly urge Judge Miley to avoid fatty foods, be super-nice to her bailiff, and to rid the house of frying pans. (Miley might also consider staying off the soccer field as well.)
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WHAT KIND OF JAIL TIME IS POLANSKI FACING?

A young Roman Polanski with his bride Sharon Tate, who would soon be murdered by the Manson crime family

There has been a predictable explosion of news articles, OP Ed pieces, blog posts, and related reader comments since the Oscar winning director was arrested in Switzerland on a 32 year old arrest warrant out of Los Angeles.

A lot of noise, passion, and emotion reflecting the public mood—32 years after Polanski’s arrest for having sex with a minor that her mother pushed on Polanski, possibly to set him up for a big civil payday (which payday occurred)—most proclaiming that the “child rapist” should be locked away in prison , and to hell with the rich (former) Hollywood bastard.

But what are the real facts, and what kind of time is Polanski really looking at if he is in fact extradited from Switzerland to face the musical score commenced by a (now diseased) Los Angeles judge who agreed that a 90 day Department of corrections evaluation should govern whether Polanski should get any additional prison time—then when the typically pitiless and cynical California Department of Corrections concluded that Polanski does not belong here—reneged on the deal and told others that he planned to sentence the famed director to prison—prompting Polanski to flee to France?

First, Polanski pleaded guilty to “unlawful intercourse” with a minor in exchange for the other charges being dismissed. He agreed that Judge Laurence Rittenband would determine the sentence. Rittenband sent the filmmaker to the prison in Chino for a 90-day diagnostic evaluation that he said would enable the Court to reach a fair and just decision.

The director did NOT plead guilty to “raping a child”, and subsequently paid the child’s mother a substantial civil settlement. Sorry, but that just never happened.Prison officials released Polanski after 42 days and advised the judge that testing indicated his sentence should not include additional prison time. A furious Judge Rittenband then said he planned to send Polanski back to prison—contrary to the plea deal.

Second, if Polanski is successfully extradited back to Los Angeles on the unlawful sexual intercourse charge, he faces a MAXIMUM of 16 months in state prison on that charge.

Third, it may not come to that.

On the very day that Polanski was arrested, an appellate panel was already deciding—on the exceedingly rare issuance of an aptly named “extraordinary writ”—whether to intervene at the trial court level and reverse the presiding criminal judge’s earlier denial of Polanski’s motion to dismiss the case due to judicial misconduct. The court of appeal took the rare step of requesting opposition from prosecutors, and was in the process of scheduling oral argument on Polanski’s appeal when the director was arrested—raising more questions about fairness and timing. That appeal is still pending.

It should be noted that the presiding criminal judge denied Polanski’s motion to dismiss on the procedural ground that his motion could not be entertained while he remained a fugitive—but supervising criminal judge, Peter Espinoza noted, however, that he found evidence of "substantial . . . [judicial] misconduct."

Fourth, Polanski could either a. try to enforce his plea deal of no additional time pursuant to the Department of Corrections evaluation stating “It is believed that incalculable emotional damage could result from incarcerating the defendant whose own life has been a seemingly endless series of punishments," a reference to the fact that Polanski’s mother was murdered in the Holocaust by Nazi’s, and to the fact that Polanski’s pregnant wife—actress Sharon Tate—had before Polanski’s tryst with the minor been brutally butchered by the Charles Mansion crime family—and her blood painted on the walls of the crime scene; or b. move to set aside the plea, and make the prosecution go to trial on a 32 year old case, wherein the victim now resides out-of-state and has refused to testify.

It should also be noted that at the time the sentencing judge reneged on the plea bargain the victim’s family was also urging the court not to sentence Polanski to any additional jail time.

Fifth , Polanski also potentially faces new charges stemming from his failure to appear in court for the 1978 sentencing hearing—although, in view of the evidence that the sentencing judge intended to renege on the plea deal—who can blame him?

The bottom line is this:

Polanski was never convicted of “raping a child”. In the face of evidence that the minor’s mother set the whole thing up to engineer a big civil payday (which plan worked—the mom who dropped her underage daughter off at the jack Nicholson party where the event occurred cashed in big).

Instead, the director pleaded guilty to “unlawful sexual intercourse” with a minor with the understanding that he would report to state prison in Chino for an evaluation by cynical California Department of Corrections personnel regarding whether Polanski should do more time, and that the recommendation would govern.

The recommendation was that Polanski do no more time.

The sentencing judge told others he was going to renege on the deal and send Polanski back to the joint.

Polanski got on a plane for France, and never looked back (until now).

Polanski’s victim wants the case dropped.

As politically correct (not to mention cheap, easy and without political risk) as it may be to rant and rave that Polanski is a “child rapist” who should do life in prison—life, as with the fact of this case, is a little less black and white and a little more complicated.

Yes, what Polanski did at an earlier time 32 years ago in Los Angeles after his pregnant wife was butchered and the press wrote about it front page for years, and after a frustrated actress and stage mother thrust her daughter at Polanski to engineer a payday (which she collected on) was reprehensible, it was awful and it was wrong.

But that tragic event 32 years ago does not define Polanski’s life, a corrupted system reneged on a deal that it made with Polanski causing him to flee his life in Los Angeles, and all the Los Angeles County District Attorney’s Office is interested in at this point is cheap political points at the expense fairness.

That is our opinion.
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BTW, regarding Bill Maher's statement last night on Joy Behar’s new cable talk show—that “I cannot think of anything worse than doing it in the nasty place with a 13 year old”—We would remind you that this is the same Bill Maher who stated on his network TV show six days after the 911 attacks on the World Trade Center (6 days!!!!—while we were still stranded at Heathrow along with the rest of the world watching those planes fly into the towers again and again) that he disagreed with the view that the hijacker’s who killed thousands were “cowardly”.

Said Maher, as he simultaneously defended the hijackers and verbally attacked the United States of America as being “cowardly”:

“We have been the cowards, lobbing cruise missiles from 2,000 miles away. That's cowardly. Staying in the airplane when it hits the building, say what you want about it, it's not cowardly.”

We therefore question Maher’s moral compass in this or any other ethical matter.